HOWTO : Make new friends

School

I had just moved to a new school and was trying sooo hard to make a good impression and make everyone think i wuz "it" ok so i had a group of friends and i was sitting down at lunch and i was having such a good time i totaly forgot that school food gives me EXTREMELY bad gas so i just ate away!

About 5minutes after lunch my stomache started rumbling and i reliazed my error. Everyone was real quiet because we were supposed to be reading and we had a strict teacher but i was about to BLOW! for REAL! so i decided to lift up half mah ass and let a lil gas slip and walk away from it, maybe blame it on someone else. So i was confident that i could do it, but to my extreme dismay i kicked it and it was LOUD! as if that one atomic blow wasnt enuff it kinda stopped and then squeaked, TWICE, at the end. And of course, who else was there to blame it on than the gurl with half her ass up in the air in farting position?

lol It was so mortifying i just ran out of the room but my mom (being the understanding woman she was) made me go back the next day!